The Long and Terrible Fire
Depression is humiliating. It turns intelligent, kind people into zombies who can’t wash a dish or change their socks. It affects the ability to think clearly, to feel anything, to ascribe value to your children, your lifelong passions, your relative good fortune. It scoops out your normal healthy ability to cope with bad days and bad news, and replaces it with an unrecognizable sludge that finds no pleasure, no delight, no point in anything outside of bed. You alienate your friends because you can’t comport yourself socially, you risk your job because you can’t concentrate, you live in moderate squalor because you have no energy to stand up, let alone take out the garbage. You become pathetic and you know it. And you have no capacity to stop the downward plunge. You have no perspective, no emotional reserves, no faith that it will get better. So you feel guilty and ashamed of your inability to deal with life like a regular human, which exacerbates the depression and the isolation.
Depression is humiliating.
If you’ve never been depressed, thank your lucky stars and back off the folks who take a pill so they can make eye contact with the grocery store cashier. No one on earth would choose the nightmare of depression over an averagely turbulent normal life.
It’s not an incapacity to cope with day to day living in the modern world. It’s an incapacity to function. At all. If you and your loved ones have been spared, every blessing to you. If depression has taken root in you or your loved ones, every blessing to you, too.
Depression is humiliating.
No one chooses it. No one deserves it. It runs in families, it ruins families. You cannot imagine what it takes to feign normalcy, to show up to work, to make a dentist appointment, to pay bills, to walk your dog, to return library books on time, to keep enough toilet paper on hand, when you are exerting most of your capacity on trying not to kill yourself. Depression is real. Just because you’ve never had it doesn’t make it imaginary. Compassion is also real. And a depressed person may cling desperately to it until they are out of the woods and they may remember your compassion for the rest of their lives as a force greater than their depression. Have a heart. Judge not lest ye be judged.
Pearl (via psych-facts)
There are moments in my life when I see with perfect clarity. When the universe is in sync, and I fully realize that everything is connected. Unfortunately, in between these perfect moments are eternities of darkness and pain. When it appears that the light I so desire will never shine again. However, I have come to realize that life is not about those dark eternities. It is about the moments of light in between.
Spencer James Nolan on being Bi-Polar (via almostparadigm)

thelilnan:

ambiants:

ambiants:

what do you get when you mix alcohol and literature?

tequila mockingbird

also Ernest Hemmingway but that’s beside the point

cracked:

"Lying gets so ingrained that it becomes more comfortable than telling the truth. Then, even further down the line, telling the truth starts to feel uncomfortable." — former compulsive liar John Cheese. #CrackedClassic
5 Stupid Habits You Develop Growing Up in a Broken Home

cracked:

"Lying gets so ingrained that it becomes more comfortable than telling the truth. Then, even further down the line, telling the truth starts to feel uncomfortable." — former compulsive liar John Cheese. #CrackedClassic

5 Stupid Habits You Develop Growing Up in a Broken Home

westemnet:

If this is to end in fire, then we shall all burn together,
Watch the flames climb higher, into the night.
Calling out father oh, stand by and we will watch the flames burn auburn on the mountainside.

almostparadigm:

You know what’s weird about having a bad parent? Like, a really bad parent? You don’t know that they are a bad parent, you just accept what they do as the way it should be done. It’s a hell of a shock when you realize that good parents don’t steal your medication. Good parents aren’t addicts. They aren’t supposed to be emotionally abusive. You get to figure it out by yourself, and then defend them for those flaws. It fucking sucks.

ohioisonfiire:

I’ve met some pricks in my time but you are the fucking cactus.

pleasuregames:

hope so…

pleasuregames:

hope so…

The devil doesn’t come dressed in a red cape and pointy horns. He comes as everything you’ve ever wished for.
Tucker Max, Assholes Finish First (via larmoyante)
God: I am God
Moses: no way
God: Yahweh